the office season 4 episode 2

Last May's season finale of The Office left fans with so many questions: What would happen on Pam and Jim's long-awaited first date? Surely Pam's radiant smile during the last seconds of the episode was a good sign, right? And what about Ryan replacing Jan as the head of Dunder Mifflin? Didn't Jan seem to be on the verge of a total breakdown? What will that mean for her relationship with Michael? Will Michael really be able to buy his condo back on eBay?

Thankfully last week's season four premiere, "Fun Run," answered all of these burning questions, while simultaneously providing some of the most outrageous and hilarious Office moments ever.

Before that infectious theme song even began to play, Michael had given us a tour of his condo, which he now shares with downward-spiraling Jan, and had also accidentally hit Meredith with his car in the parking lot. Michael's subsequent compulsion to escape blame for the accident quickly escalated into a mandatory five-kilometer "Fun Run" for the rest of the office crew. The purpose: to raise money and awareness for rabies, which Meredith was exposed to last season, and which Michael deemed far more serious than the injuries she sustained in the accident.

It was a hilarious callback to last season's "bat in the office" episode. Both the plotline and Michael's idea for the fun run, or as he calls it, "The Michael Scott D.M.S.M.P.M.C. Rabies Awareness Pro-Am Fun Run Race…For the Cure," were so outlandish and bizarre that on any other show, they would be impossible to pull off. But it's The Office: the actors and writers are so talented that everything manages to work beautifully.

The episode wasn't all about "Support the Rabid" Livestrong bracelets and rabies-awareness quilts, however. A strangely confident Pam and an even-happier-than-normal Jim spent the first half of the episode denying their romance, but by the halfway point, when the cameras caught them kissing in Pam's car, the secret was out ― although with all the jubilant screams of Office fans across America, you might have missed any and all dialogue that accompanied that scene.

"It's going really great," they told the camera, while blushing and grinning goofily at each other.

Yes, Jim and Pam rewarded their patient fans, who have waited four seasons to see their sexual tension resolved, many times throughout the episode: they kissed, held hands, made jokes, and generally cashed in on the intensely adorable chemistry they share.

But it does beg the question: where can they possibly go from here? Let's just hope the writers let Pam and Jim to be happily in love for a few episodes before they try any love triangles or other drama designed to wreck this long-awaited romance.

Surprisingly, Jim and Pam were not the only two lovebirds featured in last week's episode. Dwight and Angela got a truly bizarre storyline that nevertheless suited their characters perfectly. Angela's sick cat, Sprinkles, met an untimely end at the hands of Dwight, who argued that as a farmer, he knows when it's time for a sick animal to go.

"Cat heaven is a beautiful place," wailed Angela, "but you don't get there if you're euthanized!" These two quirky, hilarious characters had some of the episode's best lines, and left viewers wondering how their strange relationship would ever recover from Sprinkles' fatal encounter with Angela's freezer.

So, what to expect for this Thursday's episode? It's called "Dunder Mifflin Infinity," and besides more Jim/Pam and Dwight/Angela drama, it involves Ryan's triumphant return to the Scranton branch, now in the role of Michael's boss.

Wondering how it's going to go? Well, think long and hard about all those errands Ryan has run for Michael over the years ― getting to work hours early to bring him a sausage-egg biscuit, for example, or suffering through Michael's guest lecture at business school, or getting three rotisserie chickens worth of dark meat for him after his tragic George Foreman grill injury. Now don't forget: the role of Jan Levinson will be played tonight by Ryan Howard.

I hope you don't have class too early on Friday morning...one viewing of this Thursday's episode just might not be enough.
From J.J. Abrams to Charisma Carpenter to Hulk Hogan, Two Tivos To Paradise covers it all; if it's happening on the small screen and is worth your time, you'll read about it by clicking here now!

Hello Friends. I am all aglow from being at Fenway to witness Josh Beckett's amazing performance on Wednesday, and will be in attendance tonight for Dice-K's post season debut. I had a birthday this past Monday and received multiple quality gifts, plus lots of nice phone calls from friends and family. I got a great early present last Friday when I did a phone interview with James Marsters, better known as Spike. Look for it on 411Mania over the next few weeks.

Got some great new music via Amazon this week, including the new Bruce Springsteen and Annie Lennox cd's, but the unequivocal highlight was 100 Days, 100 Nights, the new disc by Sharon Jones And the Dap Kings. If you like old school R & B, with tons of horns and plenty of rough edges, this is a must own; it's the best of its kind since Ricky Fante's 2004 collection, Rewind.

The news side is coming now, nothin' is real.

This Just In
Right as TTTP was going to press, Wednesday night's ratings came in. Pushing Daisies won the 8:00 time slot easily, both in total audience and demos. Criminal Minds viewership grew by almost 2 million but it still finished third in demos behind Private Practice and Bionic Woman. Gossip Girl picked up a 1/4 million viewers in it's third week. The 10 hour played out the same as last week, with CSI:NY topping Dirty Sexy Money, with Life finishing third.

Just When I Think I'm Happy Somebody Asks Me, "What About What's Her Name?"
The industry was a buzz this week when the news broke that the potential Writers Guild strike, looming next spring, may actually happen next month. WGA members received an email on Monday announcing a strike authorization vote, meaning the work stoppage could began as early as November 1st, when the current contract expires. One of the major issues on the table is compensation for internet downloads.

If a strike happens � and that is a BIG if � you may see series that have already aired on cable networks make the jump to the major networks, NBC in particular could poach PSYCH, Monk, Burn Notice, The 4400, and Battlestar Galactica from USA and Sci-Fi, which are part of the NBC-Universal family. TNT has made the networks aware that The Closer is for sale if a strike occurs. While FX has multiple dramas that could potentially be for sale, they would require major amounts of editing since Nip/Tuck, Rescue Me, Dirt, and The Riches have liberal amounts of the kind of sex and language that the big networks can't get away with. On the plus side we might finally see the unaired episodes of The Nine and Knights Of Prosperity.

Hey Boy, Don't You Know, I Got Something Going On
30 Rock kicked off its second season last night with a guest spot by Jerry Seinfeld, and that's only the start of the stream of stars expected over the coming months. It was revealed this summmer that Edie Falco will do a 3 episode stint, and this week David Schwimmer, Steve Buscemi, Meredith Vieria, and Carrie Fisher were announced as well. The biggest name signed was far and way former Vice President Al Gore, who will be playing himself.

Not too shabby a line up. Gore has proven himself to be funny with his SNL hosting duties and I can't wait to see him go head to head with Alec Baldwin's Jack Donaghy. Or for that matter, Tracy Morgan/Jordan. Falco will be playing a democratic senator from New Hampshire who dates Jack. There is a lot riding on this season for 30 Rock - it may have won an Emmy but it's ratings have been ok at best, so they are pulling out all the stops to try and ensure a long life.

They Were All Impressed With Your Halston Dress And The People That You Knew At Elaine's
Despite debuting to poor reviews and so-so ratings, ABC continues to invest in its new high profile series Big Shots. In September it was announced that Rob Thomas, executive producer of Veronica Mars, was brought in as a consultant, and that they had hired The Dresden Files' Paul Blackthorne in a recurring role. This week's new hires include Charisma Carpenter, Law And Order's Elizabeth Rohm, and Ryan Devlin.

Carpenter and Rohm worked together on Angel � never a bad idea to get those who worship at the alter of Whedon interested in your show, and Thomas' growing influence on the show is obvious in that Carpenter and Devlin worked for him previously on VM. It's not that Big Shots is all that bad, it's just that it's not very good. I really like Christopher Titus but they need to let him know there is a difference between acting and doing stand up. Another strong move might be to have Dylan McDermott take the perfect grooming down a notch or two; his stubble was practically a co-star in the premiere. Once they brought Thomas in I was willing to give the show a few weeks to hit its stride and the cast additions work for me. I can't wait to see if Rohm finally gets the chance to emote on screen.

Don't Lose You Grip On The Dreams Of The Past, You Must Fight Just To Keep Them Alive
NBC announced that Hulk Hogan has signed to host the new American Gladiators. Expected to premiere mid-season, the updated Gladiators will feature the same format, with regular people competing against a team of athletes � the network is still negotiating with various retired professionals to take part � for cash prizes. New twists include more of a focus on the contestants back story as well as new special effects and some high text challenges.

A dead solid perfect choice by NBC on this; who better to help capture the nostalgia of this 80's show than one of the biggest "sports" stars of the decade? If you had told me while I was in high school back in 1987 that 20 years later I would be writing stories about new shows for David Hasselfhoff (see last week's TTTP) and Hulk Hogan, I would have thought you crazy. Truth be told, I would have though you crazy if you told me that last month, too. The network's stated goal of having the 8:00 hour be reality programming all week long is moving full speed ahead; they already have Deal Or No Deal, The Biggest Loser, The Singing Bee, and 1 Vs 100 with established audiences, and I can see how AG, if scheduled correctly and run through NBC's massive promotional machine, would be a hit. Can't wait for celebrity week!

PS - For those of you not familiar with the wonder that was American Gladiators, ESPN Classic shows reruns every weekend.

There Really Isn't Need For Bloodshed, You Just Do It With A Little More Finesse
CBS is going full steam ahead in its plan to swap the writers of CSI and Two And A Half Men for one episode later this season. Chuck Lorre, co-creator of Men, the top ranked sitcom on TV, has confirmed that their team's CSI episode will focus on a murdered sitcom diva and that they are in talks with Emmy and Tony winner Christine Baranski to guest star. While nothing is official about the CSI writer's script, Lorre did tell TV Guide that the episode would revolve around a dead body.

As far as ratings gimmicks go, this is pretty interesting, and may lead to me actually watching the Charlie Sheen innuendo fest, at least for this episode. If it goes well maybe next year How I Met Your Mother and NCIS could do a similar exchange. If it leads to other networks, wouldn't you love to see Friday Night Lights written by the folks from The Office?

Everybody Be Glad Because The Sun Is Shining Just For Us
Multiple new shows were announced and/or picked up this week, including a new series that team JJ Abrams' production company with Jill Soloway, one of the writer/producers of Six Feet Under and currently working on Grey's Anatomy. Their untitled ABC drama focuses on a mobile notary who becomes heavily involved in the lives of those she is working with. HBO ordered two new dramatic pilots while at the same time renewing Tell Me You Love Me for a second season. 1% is set in the world of biker gangs and is written by Oscar nominee Michael Tolkin (The Player), and Patient 2344 is a medical drama set in the near future at a ground breaking medical research facility. The show will have multiple big names in the world of cutting edge medicine working as consultants.

I am somewhat disappointed by this news as it means that HBO probably isn't going to pick up this andthe medical series Abrams was working on based on the writings of Jerome Groopman; it seems highly unlikely that they would have two medical shows considering their limited original schedule for original programming. Tolkin is a fantastic writer and I could see 1% being a real eye opener � The Sopranos meets Stone Cold. Wait, you don't remember the movie that launched The Boz?

But You Were Up To Your Old Tricks In Chapters Four Five And Six
All you need to know about the Nielsen's for the last week…Both ABC and CBS were happy with Thursday night's big CSI � Grey's Anatomy showdown; CSI won the overall battle with a sizeable increase from last year, while Grey's (down from last spring) was the 18-49 winner…All of CBS' Friday night line up was down from last year, 20% for Ghost Whisperer and 14% for Numb3rs. How could Moonlight be down when it had never been on before? Simple, the numbers were significantly lower in total audience AND key demos than Close To Home, the timeslots previous occupant…Desperate Housewives won Sunday night handily, with it's 19 million viewers being in-line with that size of audience who watched the finale…Brothers And Sisters topped Shark by almost 2 million in their first head-to-head match up…Aided by Showtime's free weekend, the season two kick off of Dexter became the network's first premiere to pull in over a million viewers. The overall numbers were up 40% from season one's average and 67% from the series premiere…Everybody Hates Chris debuted to stronger number than it's spring finale, and the new Aliens In America had solid numbers following it on Monday night…As expected, Monday night was dominated by Dancing With The Stars to the tune of over 20 million viewers…Chuck finished second in the 8:00 hour, and apparently a million TV viewers came to their senses and abandoned The Big Bang Theory, which still somehow managed to outdraw the vastly superior How I Met Your Mother…Heroes was down 15% from week one…The finale of Rock Of Love gave VH-1 it's second largest 18-49 audience of all time…People really do love Mark Harmon- NCIS kicked ass in the 8:00 hour on Tuesdays to the tune of over 16 million viewers, an almost unheard of 19% increase from last week…House topped the Dancing With The Stars results show in both total audience and key demos…The much maligned Cavemen-Carpoolers double bill on ABC averaged about 9 million, good enough for second place…Cane's numbers dropped enough in week two to finish behind Boston Legal, which in turn came in behind Law And Order: SVU…

All The Young Dudes Carry The News
Industry Notes, Pilot Updates, & Casting News…The above mentioned Rob Thomas is working with ABC to redo his cult classic show Cupid for the network. The drama, which starred Jeremy Piven as a guy who truly thought he was sent by Zeus to earth to help get couples together, stood out because Piven's performance was note perfect and the show never tipped it's hat about if he was truly Cupid or simply insane. While the lead role will be recast, the show itself will stay the same…Jon Stewart is producing a new show for Comedy Central. Important Things With Demitri Martin will debut in 2008 and be in the same format of sketch comedy & stand up that worked so well with Chappelle's Show and Mind Of Mencia…George Michael will appear as himself on two episodes of ,i>Eli Stone, ABC's mid-season replacement about a lawyer who believes he has become a profit. As you might guess, Michael's appearance revolves around his 80's classic, Faith…Best news of the week is that Eureka got renewed for a third season…Fox has ordered a pilot for a new mystery series about an ex-cop who can always tell when people are lying…All your parents out there can mark your calendars � Handy Manny's season premiere is October 27th…Lourdes Benedicto (The Nine) is joining the cast of ABC's upcoming Cashmere Mafia…Jingles, a new reality show from Mark Burnett where contestants try to make up songs for real products, got a 7 episode order from CBS. Gee, think it will be hard for them to sell advertising for that?...NBC is bring Robinson Caruso to the small screen, with a 13 episode order and fall of 2008 as a likely premiere…Season four of Project Runway will hit the airwaves on November 14th…Lorraine Bracco's first post-Sopranos project is starring in the Lifetime pilot, Long Island Confidential, as the Mother of New York cop…HBO acquired the right to Until Proven Innocent: Political Correctness And The Shameful Injustices Of The Duke Lacrosse Case with plans to make it into a movie…Billy Ray Cyrus will premiere a duet with his daughter Miley (aka Hannah Montana) on next Tuesday's Dancing With The Stars results show…Malcolm In The Middle star Frankie Muniz will be showing off his dramatic chops in a November episode of Criminal Minds…Kal Penn, Peter Jacobson, and Olivia Wilde are the new team on House, meaning they are now series regulars…Comedy Central did not renew The Showbiz Show With David Spade for a 4th season…

Turns Out Not Where But Who You're With That Really Matters
The top thing I watched since the last column went to press AKA The Best Of What's Around…I thought the 90 minute season premiere of Boston Legal was fantastic, mixing lots of comedy, the introduction of new characters, and a big murder case into a highly entertaining episode. While I was not enamored with John Larroquette's first couple of scenes, the pay off of him in bed with Shirley was worth it, especially since it seemed to be David E Kelly paying homage to the classic LA Law moment when it was revealed that Leland McKenzie and Rosalind Shays were sleeping together � I should check to see if Kelly wrote that episode, too. The moment with William Shatner and Candice Bergan on the couch was worth the price of admission, showing that Shatner's multiple Emmy nominations were about the work, not the reputation.

People Say I'm Crazy Doing What I'm Doing. Well, They Give Me All Kinds Of Warnings To Save Me From Ruin
What's flashed before my eyes the last seven days…Moonlight was just plain awful, despite Jason Doohring doing his best to give the show some semblance of energy. I know I listed off the Angel similarities last week but forgot that the lead on Moonlight also drives a convertible. The special effects were bad, the mystery obvious, and Alex O'Loughlin's lack of passion in the role was almost laughable. Too bad they didn't switch Doohring and O'Loughlin � that might have made for a better show. To make matters ever worse, Mrs. Tivo liked it! Most of it is because it was about a vampire, but still, it was not our relationships strongest moment…Andy Samberg's digital short on the season premiere of Saturday Night Live was the funniest thing I have seen in months. The rest of the episode was decent, including a solid High School Musical sketch and a fake infomercial for The Best Of The Solid Gold Dancers where the concept was much better than the execution…Carpoolers started very strong � the opening scene with the boys singing along with Air Supply took an old joke and pushed it even further � but was all downhill from there. Too many different styles of humor mixed in to be consistently funny. What was odd was that it made me think of both Sons And Daughters and In Case Of Emergency, two vastly superior comedies that ABC gave less than a season to…House is off to a very strong start, with this week's episode that found House searching for his new team a nice mix of medicine and humor. I was thrilled that Two Tivos favorite Jacobson made the cut…Gossip Girl is terrible but in a way I am enjoying so far. It's every teen soap cliché turned up to 11, but it's funnier because it's not a parody….Hope you all enjoyed Aliens In America as much as I did � gentle, funny, and smart are all things I look for in a TV show, not to mention a timeless soundtrack…I have said it before and will say it again; Patrick Warburton can make anything funny. Rules Of Engagement is the definition of mediocre yet he makes it worth watching…Loved Ted's meltdown at finding out his date was from New Jersey and not New York. Explain to me how more people are watching The Big Bang Theory than How I Met Your Mother…Chris Rock did an excellent job on Everybody Hates Chris this week in balancing playing a role in the episode with his narration of the series without making it seem weird…Hope all the hype for Pushing Daisies didn't diminish the wonderful hour of entertainment the show provided…I enjoyed episode two of Life even more than the premiere, especially the pace at which they are revealing info about the case that put Charlie in jail for 12 years…Episode two of Reaper was a lot like episode one, which is good since that means "well written" and "clever" but I am hoping that the souls they battle each week will vary a bit more in the future...This is the secomd week in a row I am raving about Donald Sutherland in Dirty Sexy Money. It must be nice for an actor to know they have their Emmy submission tape done and it's only the first week in October...Wow, there was so much man on man kissing on this week's My Name Is Earl I thought I was watching Brothers And Sisters. Craig T Nelson is a steller cast addition, and Michael Rappaport shows up next week...Isaiah Washington showed his spring of controversy did not cost him an ounce of charisma in his Bionic Woman debut. Personal feelings aside, the man has presence, and he, Miguel Ferrer, and Will Yun Lee help make up an incredibly interesting and diverse group of actors for this intense new drama...

TV Pick Of The Week
Tonight is the return of Friday Night Lights, last fall's best new show and one of the top five dramas on TV. The move to Fridays should help grow the audience but the truth is FNL will never be a ratings bonanza; frankly it's just too smart to have any sort of huge mainstream success. This doesn't mean it couldn't � and shouldn't � have a long life on network TV, but if they were going to go for Nielsen gold they would have to dumb it down, and then it wouldn't be the same weekly slice of life that we have come to know and love. Tonight's premiere contains a twist that has some critics thinking Fonzie has gone looking for water skis, but my take is that it's just a couple of teenagers making a very bad decision, and I think we all know how realistic that is. Fans of high quality television should not miss Friday Night Lights tonight on NBC.

Two Tivos To Paradise, Weekly Update
30 Days, The 4400, Aliens In America, Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations, Antique Roadshow, The Apprentice, Battlestar Galactica, Best Week Ever, Big Love, Bionic Woman, Bones, Boston Legal, Brothers And Sisters, Burn Notice, The Closer, Criss Angel Mindfreak, Curb Your Enthusiasm, The Dead Zone, The Deadliest Catch, Desperate Housewives, Destination Truth, Dirty Sexy Money, Entourage, Eureka, Everybody Hates Chris, Flipping Out, Ghost Hunters, Gossip Girl, Grey's Anatomy, Heroes, The Hills, House, How I Met Your Mother, Jericho, Kid Nation, King Of Cars, Last Comic Standing, Law And Order, Law And Order: Criminal Intent, Law And Order: Special Victims Unit, Lost, Mad Men, Medium, Moonlight, My Name Is Earl, The New Adventures Of Old Christine, Next Food Network Star, The Office, One Tree Hill. Project Runway, Pushing Daisies, Psych, Real Time With Bill Maher, Reaper, Rescue Me, The Riches, Rules Of Engagement, Saturday Night Live, Scrubs, Shark, Shear Genius, The Soup, Supernatural, Top Chef, Top Design, Ugly Betty, Welcome To The Parker

Additions :Aliens In America, Bionic Woman, Dirty Sexy Money, Gossip Girl, Kid Nation, Life, Moonlight, Pushing Daisies, Reaper,
Deletions : None

So we've got 9 new shows in the cue, although two of them (Kid Nation and Moonlight) are for Mrs. Tivo. I haven't made a final decision on Chuck or Private Practice, so they aren't on the list.

People Love You When They Know You're Leaving Soon
Here ends another edition of Two Tivos To Paradise. Let's keep our fingers crossed that by the time we meet up again next Friday, The Red Sox will have moved into the ALCS. Have a great holiday weekend - the Monday holiday is a great time to catch up on all those shows building up in your Tivos! Drawn Together is one of those concepts you read about and think, "Geez, why did it take somebody so long to come up with that one?" In this case, we're dealing with a spoof of reality television shows in which eight cartoon characters from different genres live together in a house and have their lives taped, a la The Real World. The subject matter and the style of humor made it a perfect fit for Comedy Central, and, after the first season had a fair amount of success (particularly on college campuses), a second run of episodes was a lock. Now season two of the show is out on DVD, and it promises to be completely uncensored, which either means that we'll finally get to see the writers' brilliant creative vision free of the network's shackles or that this is just a cheap excuse to drop the f-bomb and show cartoon breasts. I suppose we'll find out which scenario we're dealing with at the end of the review.

Before diving headlong in to the episodes, a brief introduction of our eight main players is in order:

Princess Clara (Tara Strong): Clara is a Disney-esque princess, cut from the same cloth as Snow White or Sleeping Beauty. However, as will soon become crystal clear, Drawn Together likes to take these cartoon archetypes and package them with some of the nastiest personality traits possible. In this case, in addition to being a dainty damsel in distress, Clara is the biggest bigot this side of Archie Bunker.

Captain Hero (Jess Harnell): It's Superman if Superman were narcissistic, cowardly, and occasionally bi-curious. Though the real Superman may only have been two of those things, Captain Hero is definitely all three.

Xandir Wifflebottom (Jack Plotnick): Xandir is a video game adventurer in the tradition of Link from The Legend of Zelda or any one of the thousands of vaguely feminine-looking dudes from the Final Fantasy series. He is also openly gay.

Foxxy Love (Cree Summer): Foxxy is a "mystery solving musician." If there were a way for three people to have the same love child and Josie of Joise and the Pussycats, Pam Grier of Foxy Brown, and Fred Jones of Scooby-Doo all engaged in that process, Foxxy Love would be the result.

Wooldoor Sockbat (James Arnold Taylor): Wooldoor is the show's answer to Spongebob Squarepants. Of the Drawn Together characters, this is the one that seems most true to the subject matter it is parodying, as most of the time Wooldoor just comes off as Spongebob thrown in to adult situations.

Toot Braunstein (Tara Strong, again): Toot comes to us from the same genre of 1920's cartoons that produced Betty Boop. 90% of the jokes involving the character center around her weight, though it's never made clear whether she's actually supposed to be obese or whether changed conceptions of beauty have left the 20's sex symbol undesirable in the twenty-first century.

Ling-Ling (Abbey McBride): Ling-Ling is a "Japanese battle monster," whose interactions with the other characters are limited by the fact that he a.) looks like should be their pet as opposed to their roommate and b.) speaks a completely indecipherable "language." He's always present when the random race-based joke is needed.

Spanky Ham (Adam Carolla): Spanky is an internet cartoon obsessed with all things vulgar, though he seems to have a special place in his heart for toilet humor.

Now that we have an overview of the players, let's take a look at what wacky predicaments they manage to get themselves in to.

The Episodes

The One Wherein There is a Big Twist (Part 2): This ostensibly picks up where a first season cliffhanger left off, though with a show more dependent on one-off gags than plot continuity, you're probably not going to notice. The cast crash lands a helicopter on a desert island, which results in perhaps the biggest laugh of the episode, as they are visited by "That asshole Jeff Probst!" Though Toot was lost and Wooldoor was presumably killed in the crash, nobody cares, as they're all too obsessed with their newfound fame. The crew declares themselves to be "too big for reality TV," but they soon find out how wrong they are and wind up having to beg their way back in to the Drawn Together house. Wooldoor turns up alive, though the cast is still forced to pick a new roommate to replace Toot. They choose Strawberry Sweetcake, an obvious parody of some dolls from the 1980's. Unfortunately, she has some history with Wooldoor, as her people wiped out most of his with Nazi-like tactics. Wooldoor makes amends with her, though, primarily because he's an idiot. Of course, this results in Strawberry attempting to murder him, but deus ex machina intervenes, kills her off, and reunites the entire cast. The "uncensored" nature of the DVD is also on full display in this one, as right out of the gate we get full frontal female nudity and a shot of a penis. Maybe it's just me, but those things are much more funny to when alluded to and not seen. Subtlety, people.

Foxxy vs. The Board of Education: Foxxy Love is busted for solving mysteries without a license, and her quest to earn said license uncovers a conspiracy designed to prevent African Americans from succeeding in formal schooling. It's headed up by the "Board of Education," a character done in the style of School House Rock, though I have to say the charm of the song and dance number he does is nowhere near the level of the originals. Elsewhere, Spanky is in bad shape due to a computer virus, and the only way he can get treatment is to "gay marry" Xandir and take advantage of his insurance. This sets off Clara's neo-conserative wackjob alarm, and she calls the "King of Insurance" to prove the marriage is a sham. As is the case with a lot of the episodes of this show, the "big" jokes are complete failures, but the very quick one-off gags and pop culture references (such as the King of Insurance carrying a blue cross and a blue shield) are gold.

Little Orphan Hero: Captain Hero, whose origin story was believed to be very much like that of Superman, discovers that his homeworld was actually not destroyed and that his parents are alive. This naturally leads to a reunion and a shocking revelation, as apparently Hero's parents attempted to abort him because pre-natal tests indicated that he would be the "lamest superhero ever." At the end of the day, Hero winds up smoothing things over with his folks, though not before thousands of innocent civilians wind up dead. As all of this is going on, the rest of the house sets up a suicide prevention hotline at the behest of the show's producers. They're all egocentric jerks, so they give up on the project after about a day, leaving Foxxy to pick up the slack. This episode is also home to one of the more obscure yet hilarious pop culture gags of the series, as a ringing phone at the suicide line results in the characters morphing in to the Yip-Yip aliens of Sesame Street fame.

Captain Hero's Marriage Pact: As if Captain Hero's life wasn't screwed up enough, his college love Unusually Flexible Girl shows up at the house to remind him of a pact that they made to marry at age thirty. (And, before you ask, Unusually Flexible Girl's powers do get used for exactly what you think this show would use them for.) Naturally, the Captain freaks out at the first mention of the word commitment, which results in UFG getting engaged to Wooldoor. This results in Hero's jealousy overpowering his fear of commitment, though now Wooldoor is jealous . . . and the entire process repeats itself. Though the episode is named after Hero's plot, the star is really Foxxy Love, who tries to reunite her old band the Foxxy 5, only to wind up cashing in big time when she inadvertently kills them and writes the exploitive yet catchy tribute song "Crashy, Smashy, Die! Die! Die!" This episode is an improvement over the first three, as it's more cleverly written with less reliance on shock humor based in racism or explicit sexuality. However, things are about to take a completely different turn with . . .

Clum Babies: Based on the number of times I've seen this episode replayed on Comedy Central, I'm guessing that it's a favorite of fans and/or network executives. I can see some of the reasons for that, though it is certainly not flawless. I've already made no bones about the fact that I'm not a fan of the series' more crude, juvenile humor. That abounds in the first act, as we learn that Wooldoor is going through "sockbat puberty" and Foxxy attempts to teach him how to masturbate. Through this, we learn that the wacky watchamacallit's sperm can cure virtually any disease. Oddly enough, the episode then turns in to a story about stem cell research, with Clara attempting to stop Wooldoor from saving people's lives because masturbation is a sin. The political end of it isn't too funny, but the help that Clara enlists in order to prove her point certainly is. I'm talking about the VeggieFables, a thinly veiled knockoff of the VeggieTales, Christian propaganda for the pre-k set. Equally amusing is the look in to Ling-Ling's personal life that our subplot provides, as the Pokemon-inspired character goes to clubs all night with his goal being to score a "battle" with other Japanese monsters. Unfortunately, the writers ruin the gag in the end by hammering home the point that the battles were just an extended metaphor for sex. Some things are better left unsaid, guys.

The Ghost in the Slot Machine: For once, we wind up with two different plots that emerge from a common event. The cast discovers that their house was built on an Indian burial ground, and the only way that they can make amends with the angry spirits is to offer them a piece of land in the backyard on which to build a casino. This leads to a good deal of traffic around the house, and even a pretty good reference to a classic episode of The Simpsons, as a character looking suspiciously like Marge appears playing the slots in the background. The gang gets in on the gambling as well, as the Native Americans are taking bets on Captain Hero's fights with supervillains. Since the odds are always in his favor, he decides to start taking dives so that he and Spanky can profit. Elsewhere, Foxxy starts a strip club to compliment the casino, which surprisingly doesn't lead to moral outrage on Clara's part. ("I'm not the same joke all the time . . . you're thinking of Toot.") Instead, the Princess wants to dance at the club so that she can impress her father, who has long been a fan of such establishments. There are a couple of decent gags and puns in this one, but I'm still trying to figure out why the folks who make this show are so obsessed with showing off naked and half naked cartoon women.

Super Nanny: It's our third Captain Hero-heavy episode of the season, and this time we learn that he's obsessed with destroying anything that claims to be "super." (Which resulted in one unfortunate incident after a waiter asked him if he wanted "soup or salad.") This time, the obsession leads to a rivalry with television's Super Nanny, who has a reality TV show in which she reigns in bratty children. Hero tries to bait her in to battle by acting up as much as possible, and it ultimately works, though the Nanny manages to get the best of him with her Naughty Stool. Meanwhile, Ling Ling decides that he needs to get a driver's license, and all manner of terrible jokes about the driving abilities of Asians are made. I know that they were going for edgy humor with that one, but this sort of "shock" humor has been done so much in recent years that it no longer comes off as cool and instead results in the show reminding me of an unruly child acting up just so they can get attention. I suppose there's a bit of irony there given the episode's other plot.

Terms of Endearment: Now this is a screwed up episode. Captain Hero gives Foxxy cancer by using his x-ray vision to spy on her when she's in the shower. He's so guilt-ridden that he decides to give up his powers, which is accomplished by falling off of a horse and becoming a quadriplegic. No, I'm not making that up. Shortly thereafter, the cast realizes that Foxxy's cancerous tumor is putting pressure on the part of her brain that suppresses negative stereotypical behavior. This turns her in to a walking billboard for every racial joke that has ever been told about a black person, and it also makes her a target of Disney, who is attempting eliminate all racist cartoons from the face of the planet. Now it's up to the powerless Captain Hero to save the day. I didn't mind the "offensive" humor in this episode as much as I did in others, because it actually did seem to build to a couple of morals, one about not denying the ugly parts of our past and one about individuals with disabilities still being able to make valuable contributions to society. However, I have to say that the Christopher Reeve parallels still made me a bit too uncomfortable to laugh. Apparently it made the network uncomfortable too, because, as is revealed on commentary, this episode was supposed to be a part of season one but got pulled because Reeve passed away three weeks prior to its scheduled air date.

Captain Girl: Captain Hero's recently acquired sidekick, Captain Girl, passes away at the hands of the evil Mad Libber, and Wooldoor immediately wants to become a replacement. He gets his wish, though, aside from a parody of the open from the 1960's Batman TV series, not much worthwhile comes out of this plot. The bulk of the entertaining material in the episode comes from Toot's new obsession with motherhood, which the rest of the cast attempts to cure by giving her a Nicaraguan baby. With the rather poor upbringing that one would expect from being raised in the Drawn Together house, the infant becomes a rebel and has a child of her own. Frankly, there's not much to say about this episode. It was just there.

A Tale of Two Cows: Wooldoor puts the entire house in danger when he brings home a cow from the "live action forest," an area apparently populated by still images of non-animated animals. This leads to one of the better sequences of the entire season, in which the cast attempts to return the cow to its natural habitat but, in doing so, is attacked by the "live action squirrel with big balls," portrayed by an image that everybody who has been on the internet for more than ten minutes has seen. The epic battle between the photograph of the squirrel and the photograph of the cow had me chuckling more than anything else contained on these two discs. Unfortunately, not long after that battle occurs, Wooldoor has to put the cow down in an homage to Old Yeller. The other cow referenced in the title is, unshockingly, Toot. She's going to the ten year reunion of her fat camp, where she was constantly picked on for not being fat enough. She finds a "cheat guide" for the video game from which Xandir hails and uses it to lure him to the reunion, where he poses as her doctor husband. This may have been the season's best episode.

Xandir and Tim, Sitting in a Tree: And, believe it or not, we've got two episodes of the show in a row that have not left me hanging my head, ashamed to be a member of the human race. The main plot here focuses on a love affair between Xandir and "Tim Tommerson," who is Captain Hero's secret identity. Xandir quickly figures out exactly what is going on: Hero has invented Tim as a split personality in order to explore his sexual orientation. Unfortunately for Xandir, there is still a side of Hero that remains very homophobic and protective of "Tim," with this side periodically appearing in order to make Xandir's life a living hell. While this is going on, the rest of the house is crushed to learn that they have been reviewed by Entertainment Weekly and given a grade of "F." This storyline was based EW's actual review of the Drawn Together pilot, with text from the real review making an appearance. In the end, the show's writers (through Spanky) make a good point, namely that the folks reviewing TV shows for these magazines aren't always from the show's target demographic. Then again, as a white, middle class male in his twenties, I'm pretty sure that I am in this show's target demographic, and I don't care for it much either.

The Lemon-AIDS Walk: We get an amusing sight gag right out of the gate, as the Drawn Together producers have arranged a badminton game between our current stars and a past cast of the show. (Which, off the top of my head, consisted in part of a Transformer, a political cartoon, Stimpy [complete with Billy West cameo], and the Hamburger Helper glove.) The game reveals that Captain Hero is no good at sports, and he vows to turn around his luck in this area by "winning" an AIDS walk. Of course, he can't even do that without resorting to steroid use, which leads to guest appearances by many other cartoon characters throughout history who may have been on the gas, most notably Popeye. The "Lemon" portion of the title is generated by Clara and Wooldoor's lemonade stand, a business that is torn asunder when the Sockbat is busted for stealing candy at a local mall. After spending ten minutes in the mall security/lost and found office, Wooldoor launches headlong in to a parody of the numerous movies/television shows in which a recently released convict attempts to deal with all of the changes on "the outside." The Wooldoor bits were fairly amusing, though I'm having an increasingly difficult time getting in to anything that Captain Hero does, perhaps due to overexposure.

A Very Special Drawn Together Afterschool Special: Xandir tells the cast that he has never come out to his parents, and he is worried about the prospect of doing so. Thus, everybody decides to help him visualize what will happen through a role-playing exercise. Unfortunately, since everybody in the house is completely insane, they take their roles too far, even acting them out when Xandir is nowhere to be seen. And, of course, it wouldn't be an episode of Drawn Together without some good, old fashioned gender bending, as Captain Hero winds up playing Xandir's mother, while Toot adopts the role of a drunken, abusive father. (Which actually fits in with her parenting skills as displayed in the "Captain Girl" episode.)

Alzheimer's That Ends Well: It's Toot's birthday, and, through a series of miscommunications with her roommates, everybody comes to believe that she has developed Alzheimer's disease. In the cast's mind, there's only one way to deal with a disease that has such a drastic effect on a person: Throw her in a home. While there, Toot discovers that Alzheimer's doesn't actually exist but is in fact a ruse developed by elderly people who want to be put in to senior centers for all of the great amenities that they receive. Unfortunately for Toot, she winds up spilling the beans, which results in a mob of geriatrics attempting to do her in. Clara has some problems of her own, as she's selected to appear on a second reality show, namely "Extreme Vaginal Makeover." This stems from a curse that her wicked stepmother put on her naughty bits, essentially turning them in to a monster. The surgery to make Clara more normal down there is a success, but she becomes so obsessed with perfection (and more surgery) that the procedures wind up doing more harm than good. Something was really off about the pacing of this episode, as for the first half it felt like they were switching back and forth between the two plots every twenty seconds. It was enough to give a guy a headache. Things had slowed down by the second half of the show, but then it became readily apparent that the only reason this episode was written was so that the writers could challenge themselves to a rousing game of "Come up with as many euphemisms for parts of the female anatomy as possible."

The Drawn Together Clip Show: Much like Bones, the episode title does not lie. This a clip show, put together under the guise of a reality show finale in which the "winner" of Drawn Together is to be revealed. Needless to say, there's not much worth talking about here.

Special Features

Audio Commentary: There are four commentaries in all, featuring a rotating crew of producers, voice talent, and other staff members. As a matter of fact, I believe that they managed to get all of the voice actors save one involved with various tracks, which is a nice touch. The individual tracks are fairly entertaining as far as DVD commentaries go, with the focus being more on general talk about the series than it is the specifics of the particular episode being played. Also, for those of you who may want to work in television some day, there's an interesting political situation playing itself out, as apparently the commentaries were being recorded sometime after production on the show's third season had wrapped up, and the producers were attempting to figure out whether they'd officially been cancelled. In addition to the four traditional commentaries, there is also a "commentary on the commentary" for the episode Terms of Endearment. This was recorded because one of the creators was not happy at all with some of his actions on the original commentary and wanted an opportunity to explain himself. Needless to say, it involves alcohol and prescription medication.

Behind the Scenes Interviews: Every one of the voice actors (except for Adam Carolla) takes a couple of minutes to sit down and discuss their characters. There's also a brief interview with series creators Dave Jesser and Matt Silverstein. I can't say that there was much of note here, although it was really bizarre to see Ling-Ling's voice coming out of an actual human being's mouth.

Karaoke Sing-Along: Various songs from the series (with accompanying video) can be played with the lyrics running across the bottom of the screen. If you're really adventurous, the vocal tracks can be taken off. I can't imagine actually doing karaoke to one of these songs, but the feature did help me figure some of the lyrics to "Crashy Smashy" without having to use Wikipedia, so the feature is fine in my book. There have been a few releases of The Graduate on DVD, but it's The Graduate: 40th Anniversary Edition (Fox) that you should shell out twenty bucks for. In addition to housing the endlessly popular and prescient film starring Dustin Hoffman as a youngster thrown into the grown-up world and Anne Bancroft as the seductress who capitalizes on his naivete, this newest edition of the film on DVD showcases a slam-bang anamorphic widescreen and a surprisingly enveloping Dolby Digital 5.1 sound mix.

Long story short: It has never looked nor sounded better on DVD.

And in addition to regurgitating all the bonus goodies that were available on previous releases, this new edition gives us two new featurettes � one of which, Students of The Graduate, features a ton of filmmakers talking about how important the film is to their work � and two new commentaries: One with Dustin Hoffman and Katharine Ross and the other with director Mike Nichols and 'moderator' Steven Soderbergh. It might have been better to marry the two tracks together � on their own, they drag on a bit � but for devotees of The Graduate, there's enough information here to truly rally the film's reputation.



Top Gun (Paramount)

So, you have an HD DVD player and are faced with this question: Do you feel the need � the need for speed?

The good news is that Top Gun (Paramount) is now available on HD DVD, and in theory, this is great news. For all of us that adored the film upon its release and continue to idolize it every time we watch it (which is often), the idea of a pristine presentation of the film in high definition is enough to make one start singing "Great Balls of Fire".

But here's the rub: Not only does Top Gun look merely 'okay' on HD DVD � the transfer print used to make the high-def presentation here is surprisingly filled with dust and grime (another round of restoration would have done the picture a world of good), and there are no bonus features available. The film sounds great � whether you choose the Dolby TrueHD 5.1 mix or the DTS-ES 6.1 mix, your head will totally explode (in a good way) � but come on, Paramount: You put out a 2-DVD set just last year, and it was FANTASTIC. Why not give the same treatment to the film on high def?

Anyway, if you still cry when Goose dies, you might want to pick this one up � I sure as Hell plan on watching it a couple times a year � but don't throw away that special edition DVD you already have: You're gonna need it.



The Boss of It All (Genius Products)

Lars von Trier is in dangerous, almost inevitable danger of becoming a joke � and maybe that's the way he likes it. His latest works like Dogville and Manderlay were thinky, dogmatic, and dull as dirt, and his newest 'comedy', The Boss of It All (Genius Products) is just as impenetrable and inane.

Basically, here's the shtick (because von Trier has abandoned the glorious emotional grandeur of Breaking the Waves and The Idiots with nothing more than intellectual paradigm shtick): The Boss of It All is a simple, by-the-book workplace comedy, but von Trier shoots the whole thing with 'Automavision', which allows a computer to randomly choose where his cameras should be set up to capture the action. Yup, that's it. Call it an experiment to see if a computer can make a dumb movie as dumbly as a human being can.

Snore.

More interesting than the film, of course, are the featurettes that describe the film's aesthetic aims and how von Trier and crew pulled everything off. But trust me: Unless you bow at the altar of von Trier (and you haven't been scared away by the droll musings of Dogville and its successors), this one is an easy DVD to skip entirely.



The Office: Season Three (Universal)

Not only is The Office an exceptionally funny series, it has always had its seasons presented on DVD with tons of goodies and impressive video and audio quality. And The Office: Season Three (Universal) is no exception.

And, of course, in addition to presenting each episode of the show's third season with gorgeous finesse, this DVD box set is friggin' hilarious. The season opener, featuring Michael (Steve Carrell) attempting to infuse his office with an open-minded view of sexual orientation, is one of the most hysterical single episodes the show has ever offered, and the rest of the season (while perhaps not as line-by-line hilarious) definitely follows suit.

Add to this the fact that there are featurettes, commentaries and deleted scenes aplenty, and this The Office: Season Three set stands as perfect TV-on-DVD experience.

If you don't already know, trust me: You'll laugh your ass off.



The Ghost Whisperer: The Complete Second Season (Paramount)

The Ghost Whisperer: The Complete Second Season (Paramount) is for admirers of Jennifer Love Hewitt's boobs only.

I know that sounds exceptionally sexist and crass, but I have to be honest: Every scenario J. Love's character is put into in The Ghost Whisperer involves her having as much cleavage as TV-possible as often as possible. She communicates with the dead while baaaaarely keeping her top on.

This being said, however, it should come as no surprise that the show is a big hit. If you can look up from her endowments every now and again, it's apparent that J. Love's character has great charisma (even if she isn't much of a rocket scientist, if you know what I mean), and while her show is really dumb as dirt, she brings a nice freshness to it.

But this DVD set really paints her as a pseudo Playboy pin-up in a paranormal world. Sure, the show looks and sounds fine on DVD and houses a handful of obligatory (and redundant) bonus features, but The Ghost Whisperer is little more than Barbarella-meets-Poltergeist, with double the cleavage and half of the campy fun.